Interesting points to reflect on. In many opportunities we see ourselves justifying each of the actions we carry out, our way of acting and thinking and in many occasions this becomes a great wall that allows us to grow, develop, and be ourselves. Although the text is written from a feminine point of view, it is a reflection for men and women.
**1. When Barbara Walters asked Michelle Obama if it was selfish for her to openly make herself her first priority, she replied, "No, no, it's practical .... a lot of times we're pretty low on our own list of priorities because we're so busy taking care of everybody else. And one of the things I want my girls to learn is to invest in themselves as much as they invest in others."
2. How much or little you're eating, especially if it's "unhealthy. " You can eat a great lunch without having to say "I haven't eaten anything all day" or eat some delicious nachos without saying "I totally deserve this, I was so good this week, I'm going to start the diet again tomorrow." More importantly, you shouldn't always have to be interrogated with "Is that all you're going to eat?" or "You're going to eat all that!"
3. Have healthy eating for health, not for weight loss. Because for some reason, people tend to be skeptical that a woman really just wants to treat her body well and not be perpetually worried about her weight.
4. Not having baby fever. You're no more or less of a woman - or person - if having a child isn't for you. You shouldn't have to back it up with reasons that you don't have maternal instincts, but maybe consider it in the future because "who knows, maybe someday!" when you really know you don't want kids, but you don't want to be labeled a heartless freak.
5. Have baby fever. No one should have to go through an interrogation when they proclaim that they do, indeed, want children when young, as it is just as acceptable to feel this way, as it is the alternative. If you want to travel, you will travel. If you want to pursue a career, in addition to motherhood, you will pursue it. As long as you are aware of the consequences, you don't need to give additional justification to people who don't feel the same way.
**6. If you are or are not having sex, and to what level ** There doesn't have to be a reason why you slept with so-and-so, and you don't have to feel obligated to give an excuse as to why you've remained celibate.
7. Enjoy what would otherwise be called guilty pleasures because they are "women's things. " These don't have to be "guilty" pleasures, they can just be pleasures. You can enjoy going to paint your nails and wear a skirt and rewatch "13 Going On 30" a thousand times and not fall into stereotypes.
**8. "When a woman leaves the house without dressing up and runs into someone she knows, she tends to feel the need to apologize for it. You don't have to apologize to someone for not being a certain way, you have to apologize to yourself for feeling that way.
9. Experiment with sexuality. It doesn't have to have been because you were "lost and confused" or you were just "a wild and crazy girl in college." If you were with a girl at a party because it was fun, fine, if it was more than that, just call it for what it was.
10. Weight. Since size really doesn't determine what "a real woman" is or isn't.
11. The amount of makeup worn on a given day. If you want to go au naturel, go for it, and if you want to look like you're in a fictional show, you can do that too. Your face. Your rules.
12. Your choice of clothing. You don't have to say you're wearing leggings "because they're too comfortable," or a dress that's too short, because "you want to have a crazy night." These things don't require any explanation, and you shouldn't let other people pressure you into feeling that way.
13. Being upset about something that involves an emotional response. You don't have to apologize for feeling something or expressing something you don't really feel. People who judge you for being a human being and having emotions are the ones who should apologize.
14. Change a relationship if it's already invested and ready ... or just put a relationship first if it's a healthy and happy thing or something you want/need to work on. There's a big difference between being walked all over and participating as an equal in a relationship, a role that usually requires compromise and effort.
**15. Wanting to marry young.
**16. Not wanting to marry young.
17. Being attractive in spite of something. You don't have to justify your so-called imperfections with those things you like about yourself - you're not attractive because you have beautiful hair despite being a little overweight. You can be attractive without having to fit into social conventions. The beauty continuum was built to make us feel like crap and buy a bunch of products to fix that.
18. Get past the "social deadlines" of things. Who cares if you're 35 and still just as single as you were 15 years ago? Life doesn't start when someone or something comes along and then society says it can start. You don't have to make excuses as to why you're not married or with kids or working. Our lives are not meant to be written all the same. When you accept someone else's narrative, it's because you're not listening to yourself clearly enough.
Source: Preferred Action
Do I need to start your healing process?
Holistic therapy gives a "push" to begin to understand the stuck emotions in your life, to heal the story of "anger and contention, no place, no meaning" So learn to ask for help when you feel you need it.
I hope this information has been helpful to you. Thank you for reading and sharing.
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